Off Topic

What the hell is the deal with all of these goddamn vampires? Romantic vampires that sparkle, funny vampires in circuses, noble vampires fighting werewolves. What happened to zombies? Not romantic enough? They don't sparkle enough in the sunlight? I guess you can't cut yourself romantically to images of sexy zombies now could you?



Why do people drive the speed limit? Yes, I'm being serious. Unless you're a complete fucking newb to driving, why, as a fully rational adult, are you adhering to some random speed limit posted on a sign that may or may not have penises graffito-tagged onto it? And no...i'm not talking to you Mr/Mrs. "I go 5-10 over". I'm talking about the jackass (probably in a champagne corolla) going EXACTLY the limit. If you look closely enough, you'll see the condensate pouring out of his/her exhaust pipe. You know what that signifies? That the poor car hasn't seen any ACTUAL driving, and if it were a horse, it would be morbidly obese. So what is it? Safety? I fucking doubt it, cuz said retard doing the limit almost never signals and almost always rolls through stop signs. You wanna know my theory? They're doing the limit to piss you and me off. That's right. So go ahead, pass em by, cut them off...and make sure you give them and their children the finger while doing so. Fuck you champagne corolla....AND your ugly children.

Has anybody seen that show "Defying Gravity"? It's some drama type crap brought to you by the producer's of "Grey's Anatomy", which is fitting, because it's basically Grey's Anatomy in space. That show sucks...and if you watch it, you also suck.

I love the sausage biscuit sandwich thing from Tim Horton's.

You know what sucks? This sucks:
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/091022/national/thief_catcher_charges
Basically, this grocer catches a theif and gets arrested for it. The defense for what can only be described as the proesecution of the "victim" in this crime, is that at the time the theif was caught, he wasn't committing a crime....my response is: Canada can suck my cock. Don't worry...I've learned my lesson from this. The next time I'm defending my home or my grocery store, I'll make sure I murder the theif, and splay his guts all over the room. If I'm gonna go to jail, I'm going in for murder. If anything, the splaying of the guts can be seen as a case for insanity...so given the ass-hated nature of our legal system, I'll be back on the streets in a matter of hours.

-Jack the Stripper